Random Notes From a Red Notebook: The 2023 AVN Show

Trip across the desert was uneventful, check-in at Sahara was easy, except for a little confusion when I ask the clerk to add "Tod Hunter" to the roster in case somebody calls me here. Room is bright and cheerful with a mirror dominating the wall next to the bed. If I were shoot a scene in here that would be cool. All the room number signs on my wing are in Gill Sans except mine, which is Helvetica. I don't know what to make of this. I Sharpie my name and phone number in a new red notebook, put on my reporter jacket, a beat-up 20-year-old Brooks Brothers windbreaker with more pockets than a pool hall, and head to the venue. Resorts World is an easy 10-minute stroll down the Strip, and memories flow as I take the walk: There's the hotel where I watched the Riviera implode from, there's Circus Circus where I played a "guaranteed win" electronic slot machine and won 25 cents on a $1.50 coin-in, there's the only-in-Vegas purple-neon-lined Peppermill coffee shop across the street, and there's the McDonald's that was moved down the block to accommodate the ambitious Echelon Place development that never happened. Resorts World was built on that Echelon Place property. Las Vegas Metro Police has a "Community Center" with a walk-up window between the McDonald's and Resorts World. After an unproductive search through the casino, I find the Expo on an upper level. There's a moment's confusion at the press room when the attendant says "I can't find your name" and Brian Gross says "It's under your real name." Oh. Walking through one hall, I see Meana Wolf at a signing station. I introduce myself, and tell her I'm a fan of her stylized work. She's happy to hear it, and I'm happy to learn that her first name is pronounced "Mee-na" because I've only seen it written down. She's kind of isolated in Vancouver, she tells me, and uses the same people because visas are a hassle.... retired performer Allie Haze, in an advanced state of pregnancy and a "Yeah Baby!" T-shirt "so people don’t hug me too tight.".... I ask Dick Chibbles, nearby, to take a picture of us. He takes the camera, hands it back a second later. He's smirking on the screen. Joker.... Katie Morgan and Evan Stone, and Stormy Daniels and Barrett Blade, signing at the Nexxxt Level booth.... Leya Falcon signing at the OCModeling booth. We reminisce about Awards shows past and she gives me a keepsake key ring from a long-closed casino, shaped like a horseshoe with a penny embedded inside. "Now you'll never be broke," she says, quoting the words on the key ring.... Holly from Playboy.... The drinking fountains at Resorts World have water bottle fillers. Welcome to the 21st century.... Jules Jordan bringing two boxes of Randy's Donuts back to his booth.... The Sahara is reveling in its historical status after a short rebranding as "SLS." There is a Casbar Lounge, named for the venue where Louis Prima and Keely Smith did their legendary all-night shows, and pictures of stars who played the Sahara including Johnny Carson, Mae West, Liberace and Flip Wilson hang on the walls, along with a picture of Frank Sinatra, Peter Lawford and Dean Martin in front of the Sahara in a climactic moment from the classic 1960 film Ocean's 11.... Feeling shaggy on Thursday morning, I decide to get a haircut and locate a promising shop called "Get A Haircut" online. I walk in and find myself facing a drum kit, part of the extensive rock and roll memorabilia collection decorating the store. The barber — who looks a lot like Steven Tyler — takes care of the haircut and beard trim as we chat about music and the memorabilia that used to line the Hard Rock. When he's finished, I ask him what I owe and he says "Ten for the haircut, seven for the beard trim, 17." I hand him $25 and figure I got away cheap.... Pro tip: McDonald's closes breakfast sales at 10:30 sharp. Get that order in on the app before then or else.... At the Galaxy Publicity booth, a fan sees Christy Canyon and Ginger Lynn and gushes "I can't believe there are legends here!" "Very few," Canyon replies. Anthony and Sandra from OC Modeling.... T-shirt: I MAY BE A BAD INFLUENCE BUT FUCK I'M FUN.... Holly Randall visiting the Brazzers booth from an adjacent booth where two mics are set up to record her podcast.... The Vixen pop-up store, outside the Expo in the adjacent shopping mall, is a treasure trove of branded T-shirts, hats, sweats, and tank tops — with an adjacent signing area. Also the occasional practical doodad like a Vixen-branded phone charger, very helpful when your phone just happens to die in the middle of the afternoon.... Motorbunny has a booth. It still amuses me that their controllers go up to 11. I see Blake Blossom early Saturday morning in a blinged-out pink dress and feathered skirt — and bedroom slippers, her rhinestoned high heels waiting to be put on at the last possible second. "Yesterday was super-busy, I went through a lot of these photos," she tells me, indicating color 8x10s at her signing desk. "I'm not charging to take pictures with people. I'm like, 'Have a sticker, take a fucking picture, post it, tag me.' I'd rather let people have these than charge for them. So many people walk up and say 'I love you.' I don't know who that is, they don’t know who I am — the real me — but they pick up on the energy that I put out. I'm glad that I'm not bitter or jaded. People here are super-positive and nice, nobody's saying 'She is a bitch' about anybody".... Texas Patti says she likes the new venue: "The old place was so dark, you looked like a vampire in pictures." .... Skye Blue tells me it's her first AVN Expo: "I got in during Covid. I'm looking forward to doing interviews on the red carpet." She is nominated for an acting Award in A Taste of Kunst and tells me she was having trouble finding things in the Nominations list. I tell her my trick of transferring the info to Microsoft Word and searching the Word doc. She's getting ready to take college screenwriting classes this spring.... Karla Lane points out a performer meeting fans at a booth: "We don’t know who she is, but on TikTok she's big".... Kira Noir always has a long line. I'll call her when we get back to L.A.... Dante Colle, who was sitting ignored at the PornHub booth earlier in the week, has a line on Saturday. Glad to see it. He's a versatile performer and a very good actor.... Introduce myself to Laney Grey and ask her if she's nominated for an Award. She says yes, Best Oral Scene, and I'm kind of embarrassed because that's my long suit. Back at my room, I check my notes from the nominations meetings and find that that scene was one of the best all year. The next day I find her and apologize for not remembering how good that scene was, and her face lights up: "Thank you!" Former AVN staffer Mark Kernes has a book coming out about the war between the religious right and sexuality, a topic he has covered for years. It’s coming out later this month. We chat in the press lounge and the topic turns to game shows, where we also have shared interests.... Derrick Pierce.... Kleio Valentein, surprisingly tan.. Syren DeMer is happy to see that the Expo being so close to the holidays didn't dampen attendance: "All my regulars were here the first day. It was great." Getting ready to leave the Expo on Saturday afternoon, I stop by the SINematica booth to say goodbye and safe travels to Jason Maskell and see a familiar face: Euro-performer Joss Lescaf. I say I'd like to meet him and when Jason makes the introduction Lescaf — surprisingly — freaks out. He says "It's an honor" in heavily-French-accented English and raises his phone to take a selfie together as I set down my bag of gear and I'm surprised to see that he has pushed the VIDEO button and is talking animatedly in rapid-fire French while I stand there uncomprehendingly smiling. I thank him and we shake hands again, and I step away on an elated emotional high when I'm abruptly stopped in my tracks by Jason. "Tod," he says quietly. "Your bag?" he asks, smilingly holding the totebag with my iPad and brand-new phone charger, among other things. At Resorts before the Awards Show, walking toward the prosaically named Resorts World Theatre I see Dante Colle leading a woman on a gold leash. Okay, this is the place.... T-shirt: IT SMELLS LIKE SLUT IN HERE.... I head over to the Red Carpet area, find Will Ryder. He likes my tie, a Jerry Garcia with a colorful spiral. We chat about our departed mutual friend, director Roy Karch.... There's a Disneyland-style zigzag queue to the brightly-lit Red Carpet, then a quick five-minute walk to the venue. It’s 8:30 now.... In the open air area between the Red Carpet tent and the Resorts World doors, a small group chats during a last-chance smoke. Doesn't smell like Marlboros to me.... Inside Resorts World, the Gauntlet is a mere shadow of its former self, maybe 10 yards instead of the lengthy through-the-casino trek in other venues of years past.... Tommy Gunn reads from his phone as we shuffle toward the metal detectors.... The bars are doing great business, people in neat queues waiting for bartenders to hold up a NEXT GUEST sign.... The price on the top item in the bar menu is $32, I didn’t read the rest.... See Dan Miller for the first time all week. He likes the tie. We chat momentarily, he goes back to work.... Dick Chibbles introduces me to a new talent, whose name I can't catch in the hubbub despite repeated tries so I hand her my pencil and she writes Tifa Quinn in large legible letters, so now I can read at least ONE thing in the notebook. Chibbles introduces me to director Max Landers, who is working with Delphine Films and was very pleased that I had seen their work.... I see Scott David, Ryder's producing partner.... Cherie DeVille walks by, rapt in conversation. I wave, she doesn't see me but the person she's with does and points me out to her. She returns the wave.... Sunny Lane gives me a big grin. "Here we go. Twenty-twenty-three. Unstoppable!" She raises a triumphant hand and heads to the auditorium.... A young woman sees me taking notes and tells me she'll coming back in a minute. I have to inform her that I don’t work there.... A woman with blue hair and a harem outfit looks familiar but I can't place her.... Peter Warren.... Him I know.... James Bartholet with SpideyPool Best Supporting Actor nominee Tyler Cruise. Bartholet, as usual, is effusive and enthusiastic: "This place is amazing! It seats 4000 people!".... A guy in a yellow-purple-and-green-harlequin-check-suit. Mardi Gras isn’t for a few weeks, fella.... Bree Mills in a military-looking tunic.... Lexington Steele poses for a fan selfie.... Seth Gamble tells me that he's building his own cinematic universe with Deranged, Privilege, and the upcoming Reckless. "And with my own characters, too," he adds with a note of pride.... A couple in mid-argument: "I. Said. No." Moving along.... Chris Streams likes the tie, spots it as a Jerry Garcia immediately. I make a tick mark in my notebook. That makes eight. He tells me that he almost bought an original Garcia painting, but somebody beat him to it. He has his eye on some Ron Wood art, though.... I head upstairs on an escalator, find a bar with no line and a MyFreeCams party behind velvet ropes.... I walk into the auditorium. It's massive. Bartholet said it seats 4000, it just might.... Meet up with Leya Falcon, in blue sequins, accompanied by her mother. The seat next to Leya is empty, so I take it. The show starts at 8:45. I was expecting a long In Memoriam, but I forgot that there have been two other AVN Awards shows, just not in person. Nick Orlandino is in there, he just passed this week. Hall of Fame. A Matt Rife joke about MILFs doesn't go over, but he saves it with a rejoinder: "You'll be 27 one day.".... Laney Grey wins the very first Award for Best Oral Scene. Nailed it.... Axel Braun, winning the Best Comedy Award, summons his cast and crew onto the stage with a casual full-arm gesture.... Can we just retire The Oprah Howl? Permanently? I am so tired of people saying "Please welcome! JOE! DOOOOOOOAKESSSS!!!!!" It's derivative, old, and lame. Even Oprah doesn't do it any more. Just stop it. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.... Looks like Seth Gamble changed his jacket between winning two Awards. Showmanship. Cool.... Maitland Ward, winning an Award, tells the crowd "Don't say 'mainstream' and 'adult.' It's one thing. You're an actor.".... MILF winner Cherie DeVille thanks "all my stepsons and stepdaughters who made this possible".... Blake Blossom graciously surrenders Best New Starlet to Charly Summer, having already won for Best Boy/Girl Scene with Jax Slayher. She'll have three Awards by night's end.... When Kira Noir wins Female Performer of the Year, the floor erupts in a screaming standing ovation that lasts a couple of minutes. I know this because I saw it when I jumped to my feet in the balcony, clapping and yelling as well. I'll text her my congratulations later tonight, her phone is probably exploding right now.... After the show ends, I see Ricky Greenwood in the lobby carrying a red box, looking for his crew. He asks me where the Award pickup area is, and unfortunately I don’t know. I assure him AVN will get the Awards to him.... Brittany Andrews sashays by with a breezy "Hey there young man".... I think she was talking to me, we made eye contact.... Kayden Kross, cradling a red box, asks me where she can get something to eat. Nothing comes to mind, so I reassure her most places in Vegas are open all night.... Bartholet finds me. "I was happy to be back, when we all got up on stage for SpideyPool. It's always good to be in Axel's pictures. He uses the same people all the time, like Mel Brooks.".... On the way out, I see two colleagues from the Nominations Meetings. I stand between them, take a three-way selfie as the crowd surges around us. If they only knew....  The security forces are emphatically encouraging people to leave the auditorium foyer and impelling us into the Resorts World hallway. They probably have lots of practice clearing the room after concerts.... With the Awards Show wrapped, at 11:30 I head off with a friend to the Peppermill coffee shop across the Strip for a late supper before heading back to my room at the Sahara. When we walk up to the hostess, she welcomes me with a smile — and something I've heard 10 times tonight. "Nice tie." Photography by Tod Hunter, Chris Brody & Jeff Koga