Gay Sex Is Legal But Louisiana Is Too 'Moral' For That

BATON ROUGE, LA—Hey, just because something is legal in the eyes of the U.S. Supreme Court doesn't mean it's okay for citizens of Louisiana, is the apparent logic employed by the Louisiana House of Representatives in voting down HB 12. That bill, introduced by Rep. Patricia Haynes Smith, would have rewritten the state's anti-sodomy law, Revised Statute (R.S.) 14:89 and 89.1(A), enacted in 1805, and added a section allowing enforcement of the remaining provisions even absent a cumshot. Of course, with 45 percent of state's respondents to a recent Gallup Poll describing themselves as "conservative," the stories of how legally, scientifically and sexually backward Louisiana is are legion, from its support for creationist teachings in schools, to its support for a voucher program that would fund religiously run schools throughout the state, to its crackdown on abortion providers with absurd regulatons for clinics and the doctors who serve them—and of course, who could forget the recent "scandal" involving U.S. Rep. Vance McAllister having an affair with his assistant, and the resultant calls, including from Gov. Bobby Jindal, for him to resign from office because of it? (Guess he wasn't as well-connected as U.S. Sen. David Vitter, whose dalliances with New Orleans hookers and even the "D.C. Madam" are well-known.) Oh; and fucking a corpse is okay too! But now, even though the U.S. Supreme Court struck down every "anti-sodomy" law in the nation with its 2003 decision in Lawrence v. Texas, Louisiana legislators have determined to keep their law on the books, intact, even though it can't be enforced. Apparently, the legislative rejection of HB 12 is due in large part to lobbying by the conservative group Christian Louisiana Family Forum, which wrote letters to all of the representatives "claiming that teenagers would be less protected from sexual predators if they went through with the repeal. They also said the bill would put the public health at risk," reported Julia O'Donoghue of the New Orleans Times-Picayune. "Louisiana's anti-sodomy statute is consistent with the values of Louisiana residents who consider this behavior to be dangerous, unhealthy and immoral," stated the Louisiana Family Forum's letter. And that letter got plenty of support, with 67 members voting against the bill, just 27 supporting it, and 11 members taking no position. "Just because we decriminalize things doesn’t make it right,” state Rep. Valarie Hodges said, apparently expressing the feelings of many of her fellow pols. "I wasn’t elected to rubber stamp the Supreme Court." Um... Val? Yeah, you were. Remember that oath you took to uphold the Constitution, including that part of the Fourteenth Amendment that says, "No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws"? That's what your sodomy law violates. In agreement with that argument is Equality Louisiana, a Baton Rouge group that advocates for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender rights statewide. "The state House of Representatives decided that the Louisiana Family Forum’s disapproval is more important than the Constitution’s guarantee of equal justice under the law," the group said. HB 12 would have kept criminal culpability for anyone who has sex with animals, and for anyone who has non-consensual sex with a person of the same gender, and in either case, all the evidence that's necessary is an exposed genital; no cumshot is required as evidence in either case. The full rejected bill can be found here. Pictured: Rep. Patricia Haynes Smith.