Porn Addiction Allegedly Leads Bookkeeper to Cook Books

NEW YORK—According to prosecutors, Randy Thomas, who worked as a bookkeeper at one of the most expensive restaurants in New York City, stole about a hundred grand from his employer to feed a porn addition that eventually ate up a reported half of the take. But I'm not so sure that was his ultimate motivation. In a deal with prosecutors, Thomas pleaded guilty Friday to the theft, reports the Daily News, which adds, “Prosecutors said Thomas cooked the books to steal approximately $96,000 from Masa between January 2011 and February 2012 — $52,000 of which he spent on porn. “Sulking in a gray sweater,” the article continues, “Thomas, 41, admitted in a plea deal to attempted grand larceny and falsifying business records in exchange for an expected sentence of just one year behind bars.” He could have faced 15 years in jail, and from the sounds of it, the judge was not very happy with the plea. “I’m reluctantly going along with the DA’s recommendation,” said Manhattan Supreme Court Justice Ronald Zweibel, who added he would have preferred “a more enhanced sentence.” In addition to the year, Thomas will repay what he took, plus interest and fines. His lawyer, who probably advised to run with the porn addiction explanation, argued for mercy. “He made an error, and he’s trying to deal with it and go forward,” said Eric Orzick. Maybe he does have a problem with porn—though few adult webmasters would likely agree with any such assessment—but a few facts contained in the article may provide a better explanation for Thomas’ actions. Thomas was paid a base salary of $34,000 by Masa, which charges its clientele $650-per-person to dine at the exclusive Time Warner Center eatery. He wasn't addicted. He was excessively trolling porn sites in a desperate bid to escape the brutal reality of his abusive existence at the hands of the avaricious Masa. I would have, too, if my wealthy employer paid me starvation wages in one of the most expensive cities in the world. No, he didn’t take the money to get off; he took it as a visceral replacement for “fuck you!”