Sheen Parody, 'Charlie's Porno Adventure,' Streets April 18

LOS ANGELES—One could say art mimics reality—and in this case they'd be right. Charlie's Porno Adventure is a calamity that was shot using the news as a script, page by page, right as it happened. Brought to you by Powersville Inc., this whole "winning" debacle went down on film hour by hour the very day Charlie Sheen got fired. This is not a comp! This movie is not a compilation of scenes gathered together from assorted scenes shot of the alleged courtesans that were with Charlie Sheen. This fiasco is an accurate portrayal of what happened, put together from the sorted accounts of the actual girls who partied with Charlie Sheen. Most of the cast actually had to go to rehab after shooting this catastrophe. It's left them all shell-shocked, dazed, and wanting to bring their story to TMZ. "I was with a bunch of method actors and actresses who were trying hard to get into the whole Charlie scene," said a recovering Jim Powers about the shoot. "Evan Stone really felt he had to do as much drugs as Charlie Sheen did to stay in character because he wanted to keep it very realistic." Powers added, "We shot this on the day that the network actually fired Charlie Sheen. The day he was actually fired was being incorporated right into the movie… The day we were shooting, all this shit was on the news, and we're up there, and everyone was fucked up and drinking and… everything was out of control and…" Powers said, his words trailing off to a vacuous as he stared out the infirmary window. Later, the director explained that the movie is a portrayal of Charlie Sheen out of his mind. It opens with a girl calling the police while being locked in a bathroom because she's stolen Charlie's watch. The entire scenario is recreated. When the cops show up, Stone, portraying Sheen, is naked, running aimlessly around the house babbling nonsensically. Throughout the entire disaster he's grinding up and snorting penis pills while prattling that he "wants to fuck every porno girl there is," when all he's really doing is watching movies of Kacey Jordan. This undoubtedly is Stone's most powerful role since playing Captain Edward Reynolds in Pirates. During the entire time filming Charlie's Porno Adventure, Teenage Babysitters plays in the background on a wide screen TV—a movie starring Kacey Jordan. Teenage Babysitters is believed to be what Charlie Sheen was really watching that day, and why he loved (loves?) Kacey Jordan so much. Watching that movie was also allegedly the motivation behind having to acquire for himself that tiny porn star's incredibly fat, meaty, pussy. Charlie was fixated and in a haze over the strumpet's sweet, silky, ridiculously big vagina. The DVD also includes a bonus POV segment where you get to have Elizabeth Ann, Charlie Sheen's real life live-in concubine, and she can suck your dick—and you won't even have to worry about having your kids taken away. It's the fan's true Charlie experience without the annoying repercussions. You have got to see Charlie's Porno Adventure, released by Powersville, Inc., directed by Jim Powers, starring Holly Stevens, Kacey Jordan, Victoria White, Vicki Chase, Jamey James, and Evan Stone as Charlie. Also with Chad Diamond, XXX Jay, Yuri and Jay Rock as the stunt cock. Street date is April 18. You can buy it at the www.JerkoffZone.com or watch it streamed live from CharliesPornoAdventure.com. Watch the YouTube trailer, then come watch the fuckin' movie. "Duh, WINNING!"